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Worst date (your fault or not)
posted in Off Topic
1
#1
0 Frags +

Once i asked a girl what happened to her pimples because last time i had seen her she had alot (she was wearing cover up).
About three times my date was cancelled because "someone had to go the hospital".

Once i asked a girl what happened to her pimples because last time i had seen her she had alot (she was wearing cover up).
About three times my date was cancelled because "someone had to go the hospital".
2
#2
4 Frags +

one where she was texting the whole time which is bad enough but eventually it came out that she was texting her dad. like ~25 texts over an hour and change. who the fuck texts their dad repeatedly while on a date. in college.

cell phone use is a really helpful way to filter people though

one where she was texting the whole time which is bad enough but eventually it came out that she was texting her dad. like ~25 texts over an hour and change. who the fuck texts their dad repeatedly while on a date. in college.

cell phone use is a really helpful way to filter people though
3
#3
-5 Frags +

rabb.it went out in the middle of our 13 hour sleepskype sesh and then she just LEFT wtf

rabb.it went out in the middle of our 13 hour sleepskype sesh and then she just LEFT wtf
4
#4
50 Frags +

lol imagine going out on dates couldn't be me !add 5

lol imagine going out on dates couldn't be me !add 5
5
#5
8 Frags +

I took this girl to a local burger joint, and all she talked about was how she got drunk in the shit bars in my town. for 3 fucking hours.

I took this girl to a local burger joint, and all she talked about was how she got drunk in the shit bars in my town. for 3 fucking hours.
6
#6
51 Frags +

2nd date I brought wawa sandwiches to her place for lunch and she had all of the lights dimmed and a bunch of expensive candles lit

2nd date I brought wawa sandwiches to her place for lunch and she had all of the lights dimmed and a bunch of expensive candles lit
7
#7
51 Frags +

My friend went on a date with an older woman who spent the date trying to set him up with her daughter.

My friend went on a date with an older woman who spent the date trying to set him up with her daughter.
8
#8
9 Frags +

dont u just hate it when this happens lads?

https://i.imgur.com/RQ2HCsU.png

dont u just hate it when this happens lads?
[img]https://i.imgur.com/RQ2HCsU.png[/img]
9
#9
2 Frags +

She spent an hour saying random numbers and asking if they're my phone password.

She spent an hour saying random numbers and asking if they're my phone password.
10
#10
-15 Frags +

I asked m'lady if I could get a waft, a sniff, a snorting of her divine halluxes (those are the toes for you plebeians). She proceeded to call me a creep, pepper spray my eyeballs to the point where I would cry, but I had grown a resistance to pepper spray due to being sprayed so many times before, and then tried to run. I teleported behind her to call her the B Word (I typically do not call a female this, but she was an exception), then slapped her so badly that her jaw shattered by the raw power of my manly attack. She then promptly called the police, who then attempted to arrest me, but I used my powerful odor and flatulence to attempt to subdue my adversaries through some sort of makeshift noxious gas. It did not work and I was tazed and taken away to jail. This was 4 months ago.

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GOING ON ANOTHER DATE TONIGHT WISH ME LUCK :)
I asked m'lady if I could get a waft, a sniff, a snorting of her divine halluxes (those are the toes for you plebeians). She proceeded to call me a creep, pepper spray my eyeballs to the point where I would cry, but I had grown a resistance to pepper spray due to being sprayed so many times before, and then tried to run. I teleported behind her to call her the B Word (I typically do not call a female this, but she was an exception), then slapped her so badly that her jaw shattered by the raw power of my manly attack. She then promptly called the police, who then attempted to arrest me, but I used my powerful odor and flatulence to attempt to subdue my adversaries through some sort of makeshift noxious gas. It did not work and I was tazed and taken away to jail. This was 4 months ago.

[spoiler]GOING ON ANOTHER DATE TONIGHT WISH ME LUCK :)[/spoiler]
11
#11
-7 Frags +
dishsoapI asked m'lady if I could get a waft, a sniff, a snorting of her divine halluxes (those are the toes for you plebeians). She proceeded to call me a creep, pepper spray my eyeballs to the point where I would cry, but I had grown a resistance to pepper spray due to being sprayed so many times before, and then tried to run. I teleported behind her to call her the B Word (I typically do not call a female this, but she was an exception), then slapped her so badly that her jaw shattered by the raw power of my manly attack. She then promptly called the police, who then attempted to arrest me, but I used my powerful odor and flatulence to attempt to subdue my adversaries through some sort of makeshift noxious gas. It did not work and I was tazed and taken away to jail. This was 4 months ago.
Show Content
GOING ON ANOTHER DATE TONIGHT WISH ME LUCK :)

man smesi really pepper sprayed you, wild.

[quote=dishsoap]I asked m'lady if I could get a waft, a sniff, a snorting of her divine halluxes (those are the toes for you plebeians). She proceeded to call me a creep, pepper spray my eyeballs to the point where I would cry, but I had grown a resistance to pepper spray due to being sprayed so many times before, and then tried to run. I teleported behind her to call her the B Word (I typically do not call a female this, but she was an exception), then slapped her so badly that her jaw shattered by the raw power of my manly attack. She then promptly called the police, who then attempted to arrest me, but I used my powerful odor and flatulence to attempt to subdue my adversaries through some sort of makeshift noxious gas. It did not work and I was tazed and taken away to jail. This was 4 months ago.

[spoiler]GOING ON ANOTHER DATE TONIGHT WISH ME LUCK :)[/spoiler][/quote]
man smesi really pepper sprayed you, wild.
12
#12
49 Frags +

we went out to a field to hit some baseballs, and i hit one directly into her face and gave her a concussion

we went out to a field to hit some baseballs, and i hit one directly into her face and gave her a concussion
13
#13
11 Frags +

i did not realize she thought it was a date until like a week after, so i was just acting like a dumbass the whole time and never texted her afterwards

i did not realize she thought it was a date until like a week after, so i was just acting like a dumbass the whole time and never texted her afterwards
14
#14
74 Frags +
warriordragon12we went out to a field to hit some baseballs, and i hit one directly into her face and gave her a concussion

Ns

[quote=warriordragon12]we went out to a field to hit some baseballs, and i hit one directly into her face and gave her a concussion[/quote]
Ns
15
#15
32 Frags +

I went to an Applebees with Console

I went to an Applebees with Console
16
#16
9 Frags +

i was really shy when i was like 19 and i just looked down and didnt say anything during a date then went back home and felt bad about it and he never texted me back

i was really shy when i was like 19 and i just looked down and didnt say anything during a date then went back home and felt bad about it and he never texted me back
17
#17
-1 Frags +
dishsoapI asked m'lady if I could get a waft, a sniff, a snorting of her divine halluxes (those are the toes for you plebeians). She proceeded to call me a creep, pepper spray my eyeballs to the point where I would cry, but I had grown a resistance to pepper spray due to being sprayed so many times before, and then tried to run. I teleported behind her to call her the B Word (I typically do not call a female this, but she was an exception), then slapped her so badly that her jaw shattered by the raw power of my manly attack. She then promptly called the police, who then attempted to arrest me, but I used my powerful odor and flatulence to attempt to subdue my adversaries through some sort of makeshift noxious gas. It did not work and I was tazed and taken away to jail. This was 4 months ago.
Show Content
GOING ON ANOTHER DATE TONIGHT WISH ME LUCK :)

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

[quote=dishsoap]I asked m'lady if I could get a waft, a sniff, a snorting of her divine halluxes (those are the toes for you plebeians). She proceeded to call me a creep, pepper spray my eyeballs to the point where I would cry, but I had grown a resistance to pepper spray due to being sprayed so many times before, and then tried to run. I teleported behind her to call her the B Word (I typically do not call a female this, but she was an exception), then slapped her so badly that her jaw shattered by the raw power of my manly attack. She then promptly called the police, who then attempted to arrest me, but I used my powerful odor and flatulence to attempt to subdue my adversaries through some sort of makeshift noxious gas. It did not work and I was tazed and taken away to jail. This was 4 months ago.

[spoiler]GOING ON ANOTHER DATE TONIGHT WISH ME LUCK :)[/spoiler][/quote]
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
18
#18
42 Frags +

my worst date was with torrit at i63 which ended with socks coming off and toes being sucked

my worst date was with torrit at i63 which ended with socks coming off and toes being sucked
19
#19
12 Frags +
glassone where she was texting the whole time which is bad enough but eventually it came out that she was texting her dad. like ~25 texts over an hour and change. who the fuck texts their dad repeatedly while on a date. in college.

cell phone use is a really helpful way to filter people though

sorry to break it to you but she probably found you ugly or boring

[quote=glass]one where she was texting the whole time which is bad enough but eventually it came out that she was texting her dad. like ~25 texts over an hour and change. who the fuck texts their dad repeatedly while on a date. in college.

cell phone use is a really helpful way to filter people though[/quote]

sorry to break it to you but she probably found you ugly or boring
20
#20
0 Frags +

I was under the impression that we are just casually grabbing something to eat. So I came with sweatpants on and no money (didn't have any on me at this point). She came looking like she prepared for an hour. Long story short we didn't go anywhere.

Funny enough we have been together for a year now though.

I was under the impression that we are just casually grabbing something to eat. So I came with sweatpants on and no money (didn't have any on me at this point). She came looking like she prepared for an hour. Long story short we didn't go anywhere.

Funny enough we have been together for a year now though.
21
#21
39 Frags +

took a vegan to a steakhouse

took a vegan to a steakhouse
22
#22
15 Frags +

joined the furrypound server under the impression that we were about to chop it up and she calls me a goon and leaves like wtf stop playing

joined the furrypound server under the impression that we were about to chop it up and she calls me a goon and leaves like wtf stop playing
23
#23
15 Frags +

he got me wet within 10 minutes of meeting... but not in a good way. we were walking and he didn't look where he was going so stepped into a really deep puddle and drenched me in puddle water from the legs down.

he got me wet within 10 minutes of meeting... but not in a good way. we were walking and he didn't look where he was going so stepped into a really deep puddle and drenched me in puddle water from the legs down.
24
#24
13 Frags +
Snacktook a vegan to a steakhouse

i hope you ate her

[quote=Snack]took a vegan to a steakhouse[/quote]
i hope you ate her
25
#25
11 Frags +
paskoglassone where she was texting the whole time which is bad enough but eventually it came out that she was texting her dad. like ~25 texts over an hour and change. who the fuck texts their dad repeatedly while on a date. in college.

cell phone use is a really helpful way to filter people though

sorry to break it to you but she probably found you ugly or boring

we dated for nine months. when i said "cell phone use is a really helpful way to filter people" i was speaking as someone who should've learned the lesson a lot sooner

[quote=pasko][quote=glass]one where she was texting the whole time which is bad enough but eventually it came out that she was texting her dad. like ~25 texts over an hour and change. who the fuck texts their dad repeatedly while on a date. in college.

cell phone use is a really helpful way to filter people though[/quote]

sorry to break it to you but she probably found you ugly or boring[/quote]
we dated for nine months. when i said "cell phone use is a really helpful way to filter people" i was speaking as someone who should've learned the lesson a lot sooner
26
#26
6 Frags +
warriordragon12we went out to a field to hit some baseballs, and i hit one directly into her face and gave her a concussion

Something similar happened to me lol
We went ice skating..it was my first time ice skating. We tried to hold hands and I accidentally fell over, elbowing her in the mouth and she was bleeding so bad.
Was not a great time

[quote=warriordragon12]we went out to a field to hit some baseballs, and i hit one directly into her face and gave her a concussion[/quote]
Something similar happened to me lol
We went ice skating..it was my first time ice skating. We tried to hold hands and I accidentally fell over, elbowing her in the mouth and she was bleeding so bad.
Was not a great time
27
#27
15 Frags +

She somehow brought up the subject of discussing gay porn with her uncle which confused me to shit and for the entirety of the date I didn't know what to say. Also to avoid looking confused I took like 5 seconds to select a random pizza off the menu which ended up being with topped with figs and I just didn't eat it.

She somehow brought up the subject of discussing gay porn with her uncle which confused me to shit and for the entirety of the date I didn't know what to say. Also to avoid looking confused I took like 5 seconds to select a random pizza off the menu which ended up being with topped with figs and I just didn't eat it.
28
#28
26 Frags +

her ex came home as I was leaving and stabbed my front tire

her ex came home as I was leaving and stabbed my front tire
29
#29
33 Frags +

warning homo alert below

Show Content
first date with a man I'd ever been on I was 18 and been talking to this policeman for a while, unfortunately on the date he was very rude to the waiter mega red flag & was telling me all these stories about how he pulled people over pointlessly just to screw with them. We went and saw a film afterwards and he put his arm round me, which I didn't mind too much but he slowly made his way down into my jeans which made me extremely uncomfortable. I was sort of trying to pull away from him and he ends up pretty much trying to finger my ass which at that point I got up and sat somewhere else cause tbh the film was pretty good (captain america very epic.)
At the end he caught up to me and apologised saying he'd misread the situation and I walked with him to his car just to be cordial, at which point he invited me to have sex with him in his car. I politely declined.

Later in life I was having a very nice date with a carribean man until he found out I didn't know what jerk chicken was and at that point he started to heavily imply I was racist, saying things such as 'have you ever actually spoken to a black person before?' and asking if I was only interested in him because he was black. I have had black friends before but at the time I'd just never had a conversation about jerk chicken. It was very uncomfortable.

I can say I have never had a bad date with the opposite sex :-)

warning homo alert below

[spoiler]first date with a man I'd ever been on I was 18 and been talking to this policeman for a while, unfortunately on the date he was very rude to the waiter mega red flag & was telling me all these stories about how he pulled people over pointlessly just to screw with them. We went and saw a film afterwards and he put his arm round me, which I didn't mind too much but he slowly made his way down into my jeans which made me extremely uncomfortable. I was sort of trying to pull away from him and he ends up pretty much trying to finger my ass which at that point I got up and sat somewhere else cause tbh the film was pretty good (captain america very epic.)
At the end he caught up to me and apologised saying he'd misread the situation and I walked with him to his car just to be cordial, at which point he invited me to have sex with him in his car. I politely declined.

Later in life I was having a very nice date with a carribean man until he found out I didn't know what jerk chicken was and at that point he started to heavily imply I was racist, saying things such as 'have you ever actually spoken to a black person before?' and asking if I was only interested in him because he was black. I have had black friends before but at the time I'd just never had a conversation about jerk chicken. It was very uncomfortable. [/spoiler]

I can say I have never had a bad date with the opposite sex :-)
30
#30
32 Frags +

so picture this fellas, there I was just eating my beans and trying to enjoy Cars 2...

so picture this fellas, there I was just eating my beans and trying to enjoy Cars 2...
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