Gender is an idea. A concept. Its not one categorization, relatively speaking everyone has a gender but the question is who has what at what time?
RenhetremedyI just don't understand the comparison between gender dysphoria and being overweight.clorgI have a friend IRL that is transexual. She is still pretty fashionable, very indie looking, etc, but she is transexual. She takes a lot of hormones and dresses in girl clothes.before you plus frag clorg keep in mind he thinks having gender dysphoria and being gay are choices
She keeps complaining about how other people make fun of her when she's working at her clothing store. I never comment on her gender - it doesn't bother me on its own, but sometimes there are times when I want to and I don't, because I'm her friend.
I personally think its pretty unreasonable to expect people not to shame you if you're transsexual, since it is an inherently unhealthy/ugly trait. I would never hate on anyone solely because of their gender, don't get me wrong - but, there are plenty of times when it does seem appropriate to shame someone and bring them back down to reality.
opinions
http://natf2.com/topics/4580?page=5#p94619
i hope you arent being serious right now
She keeps complaining about how other people make fun of her when she's working at her clothing store. I never comment on her gender - it doesn't bother me on its own, but sometimes there are times when I want to and I don't, because I'm her friend.
I personally think its pretty unreasonable to expect people not to shame you if you're transsexual, since it is an inherently unhealthy/ugly trait. I would never hate on anyone solely because of their gender, don't get me wrong - but, there are plenty of times when it does seem appropriate to shame someone and bring them back down to reality.
opinions[/quote]
before you plus frag clorg keep in mind he thinks having gender dysphoria and being gay are choices[/quote]
I just don't understand the comparison between gender dysphoria and being overweight.[/quote]
http://natf2.com/topics/4580?page=5#p94619
i hope you arent being serious right now
clorgI have a friend IRL that is transexual. She is still pretty fashionable, very indie looking, etc, but she is transexual. She takes a lot of hormones and dresses in girl clothes.
She keeps complaining about how other people make fun of her when she's working at her clothing store. I never comment on her gender - it doesn't bother me on its own, but sometimes there are times when I want to and I don't, because I'm her friend.
I personally think its pretty unreasonable to expect people not to shame you if you're transsexual, since it is an inherently unhealthy/ugly trait. I would never hate on anyone solely because of their gender, don't get me wrong - but, there are plenty of times when it does seem appropriate to shame someone and bring them back down to reality.
opinions
"friend"
She keeps complaining about how other people make fun of her when she's working at her clothing store. I never comment on her gender - it doesn't bother me on its own, but sometimes there are times when I want to and I don't, because I'm her friend.
I personally think its pretty unreasonable to expect people not to shame you if you're transsexual, since it is an inherently unhealthy/ugly trait. I would never hate on anyone solely because of their gender, don't get me wrong - but, there are plenty of times when it does seem appropriate to shame someone and bring them back down to reality.
opinions[/quote]
"friend"
clorg
http://natf2.com/topics/4580?page=5#p94619
i hope you arent being serious right now
What does that have to do with comparing excess fat and gender dysphoria? Please enlighten me.
It's been established that most people are overweight by choice. Gender dysphoria, by scientific research and medical professionals, is not.
http://natf2.com/topics/4580?page=5#p94619
i hope you arent being serious right now[/quote]
What does that have to do with comparing excess fat and gender dysphoria? Please enlighten me.
It's been established that most people are overweight by choice. Gender dysphoria, by scientific research and medical professionals, is not.
dingoi think if you were born with a dick you're a guy
i think that's a close-minded opinion but you have a right to it so I wont judge you for it.
see what writing things like that accomplishes?
i think that's a close-minded opinion but you have a right to it so I wont judge you for it.
see what writing things like that accomplishes?
This is one of the dumbest threads I've ever seen, but it's a typical mentality these days. You are admittedly transsexual. You fight for the LGBT community to have equality and for people to treat you as equal rather than treating you differently because you were born male.
...but you turn around and judge other people for superficial reasons? Really?
Unfortunately, you are not alone. Most of the people who vehemently fight for equality in the LGBT community are hypocrites. They want everyone to think of them and treat them as equal, but those who don't treat them as equal are chastised for it. The recurring mentality is essentially, "You don't treat me like an equal? You're a piece of crap!"
Gender dysmorphia, gay, bi, fat, skinny, ugly, pale, dark, blah blah blah. Here's an idea: don't judge people. And for damn sure--don't judge people when you're part of a group complaining about being judged.
What a fucking joke.
...but you turn around and judge other people for superficial reasons? Really?
Unfortunately, you are not alone. Most of the people who vehemently fight for equality in the LGBT community are hypocrites. They want everyone to think of them and treat them as equal, but those who don't treat them as equal are chastised for it. The recurring mentality is essentially, "You don't treat me like an equal? You're a piece of crap!"
Gender dysmorphia, gay, bi, fat, skinny, ugly, pale, dark, blah blah blah. Here's an idea: don't judge people. And for damn sure--don't judge people when you're part of a group complaining about being judged.
What a fucking joke.
how can you call being fat un-desirable and disgusting when you pretend to be a girl
You should help your friend by being supportive. Tell her that you do care for her and ask her if there is anything that you can do to help. Tell her that you care for her as a person but you are concerned for health reasons. You also have to accept that fact that she may not be ready to let go of her weight. I am glad to hear that she has a friend like you.
I know a lady who is overweight because she was hurt by a man so badly (read between the lines there...PTSD) that she gained weight and hangs onto it because she doesn't want the attention from men...FACT! So don't judge, accept people for who they are as people not for what they look like. Life is short and we need to enjoy it the best we can with the best supportive people around us.
People have reasons why they are the way they are. If you judge them by the way they look then I really hope to God that something bad doesn't happen to you and you get treated in that way. What if you were always popular because of the way you looked and had no personality ect? Then what if something tragic happened like your face got burned and people started to judge you like you did to others? What do you have left? Who are you as a person...a human being? Take a look around at yourself and your friends. Would they stick around if you for some reason wasn't physically attractive anymore?
To flip this to the other side of the coin, I have a drop dead beautiful blonde girl friend who tells me it drove her crazy dating cause she never really knew 100% if men just wanted her for her body or for her as a person. It really bothered her and still does. She just wants to be liked for being "herself as a person" not because of her body that gets double takes everywhere she goes.
At the end of the day for me we need to be supportive and don't judge!! If you judge may you never feel that pain that you have caused to others People who are overweight are not lazy, they truly and generally don't want to be that way...they just don't have the tools, resources, mental capacity, self-esteem, self-worth or support to change. Don
I know a lady who is overweight because she was hurt by a man so badly (read between the lines there...PTSD) that she gained weight and hangs onto it because she doesn't want the attention from men...FACT! So don't judge, accept people for who they are as people not for what they look like. Life is short and we need to enjoy it the best we can with the best supportive people around us.
People have reasons why they are the way they are. If you judge them by the way they look then I really hope to God that something bad doesn't happen to you and you get treated in that way. What if you were always popular because of the way you looked and had no personality ect? Then what if something tragic happened like your face got burned and people started to judge you like you did to others? What do you have left? Who are you as a person...a human being? Take a look around at yourself and your friends. Would they stick around if you for some reason wasn't physically attractive anymore?
To flip this to the other side of the coin, I have a drop dead beautiful blonde girl friend who tells me it drove her crazy dating cause she never really knew 100% if men just wanted her for her body or for her as a person. It really bothered her and still does. She just wants to be liked for being "herself as a person" not because of her body that gets double takes everywhere she goes.
At the end of the day for me we need to be supportive and don't judge!! If you judge may you never feel that pain that you have caused to others People who are overweight are not lazy, they truly and generally don't want to be that way...they just don't have the tools, resources, mental capacity, self-esteem, self-worth or support to change. Don
smakersThis is one of the dumbest threads I've ever seen, but it's a typical mentality these days. You are admittedly transsexual. You fight for the LGBT community to have equality and for people to treat you as equal rather than treating you differently because you were born male.
...but you turn around and judge other people for superficial reasons? Really?
Unfortunately, you are not alone. Most of the people who vehemently fight for equality in the LGBT community are hypocrites. They want everyone to think of them and treat them as equal, but those who don't treat them as equal are chastised for it. The recurring mentality is essentially, "You don't treat me like an equal? You're a piece of crap!"
Gender dysmorphia, gay, bi, fat, skinny, ugly, pale, dark, blah blah blah. Here's an idea: don't judge people. And for damn sure--don't judge people when you're part of a group complaining about being judged.
What a fucking joke.
What smakers said. Also, people act so elitist, like they are all that in a bag of chips (no pun intended towards the topic) and think everything they don't believe in/aren't a part of is immoral or wrong. Fact is, until you actually LIVE through what they go through, you have absolutely NO room to even begin to judge anyone.
I'm not trying to make a sob story or anything, but for the past few years, I have been mildly depressed. My parents got divorced, I had to put my first dog down, I feel disgusting, because I am a little overweight, and people put me down at school. Even through ALL of that, I have never once judged or said anything to anyone who has dealt with anything of what I have dealt with. If you were truly her friend, you wouldn't go behind her back and post on the forums basically degrading here in front of the entire internet, which basically everyone has access too.
TL;DR: Don't Judge before you have experienced and know what they have gone through.
...but you turn around and judge other people for superficial reasons? Really?
Unfortunately, you are not alone. Most of the people who vehemently fight for equality in the LGBT community are hypocrites. They want everyone to think of them and treat them as equal, but those who don't treat them as equal are chastised for it. The recurring mentality is essentially, "You don't treat me like an equal? You're a piece of crap!"
Gender dysmorphia, gay, bi, fat, skinny, ugly, pale, dark, blah blah blah. Here's an idea: don't judge people. And for damn sure--don't judge people when you're part of a group complaining about being judged.
What a fucking joke.[/quote]
What smakers said. Also, people act so elitist, like they are all that in a bag of chips (no pun intended towards the topic) and think everything they don't believe in/aren't a part of is immoral or wrong. Fact is, until you actually LIVE through what they go through, you have absolutely NO room to even begin to judge anyone.
I'm not trying to make a sob story or anything, but for the past few years, I have been mildly depressed. My parents got divorced, I had to put my first dog down, I feel disgusting, because I am a little overweight, and people put me down at school. Even through ALL of that, I have never once judged or said anything to anyone who has dealt with anything of what I have dealt with. If you were truly her friend, you wouldn't go behind her back and post on the forums basically degrading here in front of the entire internet, which basically everyone has access too.
TL;DR: Don't Judge before you have experienced and know what they have gone through.
transfat has been really getting some bad publicity these past years
dingohow can you call being fat un-desirable and disgusting when you pretend to be a girl
you look really gross, so dont talk about desirable...
you look really gross, so dont talk about desirable...
dingohow can you call being fat un-desirable and disgusting when you pretend to be a girl
I'm pretty sure that I'm beautiful L0L dont have to pretend mate
smakers
You can't really compare being LGBT with obesity. If it really upsets people to be made fun of when they're obese, they can lose weight. If you're gay or whatever, there is shit all you can do about people making fun of you, thus there is a cause to fight for.
Also, I don't expect people to treat me as an equal. I have come to accept that in todays society, however normal and cis I may look and sound, if someone finds out about me being transgender they will most likely be a little put off. I'm not bothered. There's nothing I can change about it.
But if I could, I know that I would do anything and everything I could to do so
I'm pretty sure that I'm beautiful L0L dont have to pretend mate
[quote=smakers][/quote]
You can't really compare being LGBT with obesity. If it really upsets people to be made fun of when they're obese, they can lose weight. If you're gay or whatever, there is shit all you can do about people making fun of you, thus there is a cause to fight for.
Also, I don't expect people to treat me as an equal. I have come to accept that in todays society, however normal and cis I may look and sound, if someone finds out about me being transgender they will most likely be a little put off. I'm not bothered. There's nothing I can change about it.
[b]But if I could, I know that I would do anything and everything I could to do so[/b]
wafflebdingohow can you call being fat un-desirable and disgusting when you pretend to be a girl
I'm pretty sure that I'm beautiful L0L dont have to pretend mate
smakersYou can't really compare being LGBT with obesity. If it really upsets people to be made fun of when they're obese, they can lose weight. If you're gay or whatever, there is shit all you can do about people making fun of you, thus there is a cause to fight for.
Also, I don't expect people to treat me as an equal. I have come to accept that in todays society, however normal and cis I may look and sound, if someone finds out about me being transgender they will most likely be a little put off. I'm not bothered. There's nothing I can change about it.
But if I could, I know that I would do anything and everything I could to do so
You act as if losing all the weight is so easy.
I'm pretty sure that I'm beautiful L0L dont have to pretend mate
[quote=smakers][/quote]
You can't really compare being LGBT with obesity. If it really upsets people to be made fun of when they're obese, they can lose weight. If you're gay or whatever, there is shit all you can do about people making fun of you, thus there is a cause to fight for.
Also, I don't expect people to treat me as an equal. I have come to accept that in todays society, however normal and cis I may look and sound, if someone finds out about me being transgender they will most likely be a little put off. I'm not bothered. There's nothing I can change about it.
[b]But if I could, I know that I would do anything and everything I could to do so[/b][/quote]
You act as if losing all the weight is so easy.
remedydingohow can you call being fat un-desirable and disgusting when you pretend to be a girlyou look really gross, so dont talk about desirable...
dusnt mater if i hav swag
you look really gross, so dont talk about desirable...[/quote]
dusnt mater if i hav swag[img]https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ4UARN_wuH80Gv-8czg11Sms7nLIL0l1iSrflFbfZ_rH30AGIRqA[/img]
Justifyedwafflebdingohow can you call being fat un-desirable and disgusting when you pretend to be a girl
I'm pretty sure that I'm beautiful L0L dont have to pretend mate
smakersYou can't really compare being LGBT with obesity. If it really upsets people to be made fun of when they're obese, they can lose weight. If you're gay or whatever, there is shit all you can do about people making fun of you, thus there is a cause to fight for.
Also, I don't expect people to treat me as an equal. I have come to accept that in todays society, however normal and cis I may look and sound, if someone finds out about me being transgender they will most likely be a little put off. I'm not bothered. There's nothing I can change about it.
But if I could, I know that I would do anything and everything I could to do so
You act as if losing all the weight is so easy.
You act like it's difficult. Diet, excercise, perhaps a metabolic from a doctor (if the person actually has a thyroid problem) and some time and dedication, most people stop being fat.
I'm pretty sure that I'm beautiful L0L dont have to pretend mate
[quote=smakers][/quote]
You can't really compare being LGBT with obesity. If it really upsets people to be made fun of when they're obese, they can lose weight. If you're gay or whatever, there is shit all you can do about people making fun of you, thus there is a cause to fight for.
Also, I don't expect people to treat me as an equal. I have come to accept that in todays society, however normal and cis I may look and sound, if someone finds out about me being transgender they will most likely be a little put off. I'm not bothered. There's nothing I can change about it.
[b]But if I could, I know that I would do anything and everything I could to do so[/b][/quote]
You act as if losing all the weight is so easy.[/quote]
You act like it's difficult. Diet, excercise, perhaps a metabolic from a doctor (if the person actually has a thyroid problem) and some time and dedication, most people stop being fat.
Agreed that it can be an addiction. For some people they'ed prefer to not drink anything at all if their only option is water.
It's threads like these that make it clearer to me as to why I've become such a misanthrope. That's good I suppose.
Is it terribly difficult to behave with what some would describe as decency towards other people or avoid being around them (so as to prevent mutual agitation)?
No amount of shame will ever cause somebody to change a behavior. They have to decide that they make their own rules for themselves and that they'd prefer to be a certain way. It will either happen or it won't and there's really nothing anyone else can do to affect that change without arbitrarily imposing their will on another person (and that generally doesn't generate good feelings between individuals).
Is it terribly difficult to behave with what some would describe as decency towards other people or avoid being around them (so as to prevent mutual agitation)?
No amount of shame will ever cause somebody to change a behavior. They have to decide that they make their own rules for themselves and that they'd prefer to be a certain way. It will either happen or it won't and there's really nothing anyone else can do to affect that change without arbitrarily imposing their will on another person (and that generally doesn't generate good feelings between individuals).
wafflebI have a friend IRL that is obese. She is still pretty fashionable, very indie looking, etc, but she is obese. She eats a lot and she doesn't exercise.
She keeps complaining about how other people make fun of her when she's working at her (plus size) clothing store. I never comment on her weight - it doesn't bother me on its own, but sometimes there are times when I want to and I don't, because I'm her friend.
I personally think its pretty unreasonable to expect people not to shame you if you're obese, since it is an inherently unhealthy/ugly trait. I would never hate on anyone solely because of their weight, don't get me wrong - but, there are plenty of times when it does seem appropriate to shame someone and bring them back down to reality.
opinions
What about not giving a single fuck about her body, because you are her friend?
Only thing you should mention is about the complaints: You should tell her, that she cannot eat as much as she wants and keeps complaining about her weight/body/whatever. Do something against it, otherwise, just live with it! Honestly, these ppl, who are complaining about something, that could be changed easily, are the worst.
Eat healthier, do some sports...it's that easy!
She keeps complaining about how other people make fun of her when she's working at her (plus size) clothing store. I never comment on her weight - it doesn't bother me on its own, but sometimes there are times when I want to and I don't, because I'm her friend.
I personally think its pretty unreasonable to expect people not to shame you if you're obese, since it is an inherently unhealthy/ugly trait. I would never hate on anyone solely because of their weight, don't get me wrong - but, there are plenty of times when it does seem appropriate to shame someone and bring them back down to reality.
opinions[/quote]What about not giving a single fuck about her body, because you are her friend?
Only thing you should mention is about the complaints: You should tell her, that she cannot eat as much as she wants and keeps complaining about her weight/body/whatever. Do something against it, otherwise, just live with it! Honestly, these ppl, who are complaining about something, that could be changed easily, are the worst.
Eat healthier, do some sports...it's that easy!
[spoiler]And stop fucking complaining![/spoiler]
the only time i ever care about weight is when it comes to dating someone really, as that is an attraction factor. If things are just platonic or normal or w/e then idk why anyone would give a fuck outside of caring that someone you like might die if it's a super serious case.
i've been underweight all my life too so it's not like i'm saying this coz i'm fat or something, but it's not that big of a deal that I think you need to sham every overweight person to try to fix it.
i've been underweight all my life too so it's not like i'm saying this coz i'm fat or something, but it's not that big of a deal that I think you need to sham every overweight person to try to fix it.
smakersHere's an idea: don't judge people. And for damn sure--don't judge people when you're part of a group complaining about being judged.
What a fucking joke.
It's so great and nice to be able to walk out in the world and never get judged because humans don't think like that. Oh wait.
What a fucking joke.[/quote]
It's so great and nice to be able to walk out in the world and never get judged because humans don't think like that. [b]Oh wait.[/b]
FrancesmakersHere's an idea: don't judge people. And for damn sure--don't judge people when you're part of a group complaining about being judged.It's so great and nice to be able to walk out in the world and never get judged because humans don't think like that. Oh wait.
What a fucking joke.
Oh wait, you just judged the whole world!
What a fucking joke.[/quote]
It's so great and nice to be able to walk out in the world and never get judged because humans don't think like that. [b]Oh wait.[/b][/quote]
Oh wait, you just judged the whole world!
pine_beetleOh wait, you just judged the whole world!
Oh no!
Oh wait, you just judged the whole world![/quote]
Oh no!
You are born with your sexuality, you are not born unhealthy.
Being fat is generally unpleasant because we inherently view healthy as sexy. Lazy fat is something the person can do something about unless they have a thyroid or genetic metabolic issue, in which case should still be treated because it will shorten your lifespan.
You cannot change your sexuality, no matter how much you want too. If you have to "make a choice" on what gender to date, then you're bi and just don't know it yet.
Anyone who compares being lazy fat and being gay is just ignorant. One is a choice, the other is not.
When I was a kid people still thought being gay was a choice, and I feel bad for anytime I made gay jokes, but we're talking decades ago before the internet and everyone was ignorant. There is no excuse these days.
If you think your friend wants to be more healthy, offer to go for a workout together or maybe try to take more walks/hikes. If they start to enjoy being more active they will start to change their lifestyle on their own. And try not to pig out on junk food in front of them. You can still mention it to them, but shaming isn't the way to go.
Being fat is generally unpleasant because we inherently view healthy as sexy. Lazy fat is something the person can do something about unless they have a thyroid or genetic metabolic issue, in which case should still be treated because it will shorten your lifespan.
You cannot change your sexuality, no matter how much you want too. If you have to "make a choice" on what gender to date, then you're bi and just don't know it yet.
Anyone who compares being lazy fat and being gay is just ignorant. One is a choice, the other is not.
When I was a kid people still thought being gay was a choice, and I feel bad for anytime I made gay jokes, but we're talking decades ago before the internet and everyone was ignorant. There is no excuse these days.
If you think your friend wants to be more healthy, offer to go for a workout together or maybe try to take more walks/hikes. If they start to enjoy being more active they will start to change their lifestyle on their own. And try not to pig out on junk food in front of them. You can still mention it to them, but shaming isn't the way to go.