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Depression
posted in Off Topic
1
#1
12 Frags +

Hello, i wont say who i am or what age i am. I want to be anonymous. Sorry, my thoughts are scattered.

To be honest, if i wasn't a nerd i would probably be at an insane asylum, cause im fucked up. Im an extremely negative person, am very introvert and have serious anger issues. So if i wasn't at my computer all day and forgetting about my miserable existence i dont quite know if i would even be alive at this point.

Lets start from the beginning, i started school a year before children from my country normally would, i did this because me and my family moved to spain, and i started going to an international school. i went to this school for 6.5 years, and this is were most of my depression has its roots. You see, this school was international, so for the most part i was the only one from my country in my year. I also have a very.... different sense of humor. This meant that i didnt really get any friends. So i started using the pc, and played WoW. This made me even more of a weirdo, and people started hating me more.I was also very good in terms of grades, which didnt help. Quickly i became the stupid nerd that nobody liked. I was even told by a guy after i was forced to pick him for my team in cops and robbers that i was an idiot. The last half of a year i was there i started getting fed up, reacted back, and thus became even more hated. I was so happy when my parents told me i got to move back to denmark. Then we moved back to my home country.

Show Content
Shoutout to sotogrande international school for being retarded. I literally started shaking with rage writing this.

So we came back to my home country and i went to a different kind of school, and there were nerds like me. But there were also assholes. Lots and lots of assholes. For every one friend ive made i have made about 3 enemies. I guess I should also say that every time i got really mad and lost my temper, it would be treated with anger and getting told off, making me hate myself more and more. People say that i should talk to people about it, but being extremely introvert makes this very hard. When puberty hit this got even worse, and i started getting even more mad at myself every time i lost my shit. Being told by a teacher how you've given someone a concussion after they've taunted you for 1.5 years and how bad and stupid your reaction is, it hurts.

Even online i never really got any attention, no one cared. Not online, nor offline. My parents didnt care, and to be frank my parents really dont like the way my life is turning out. The fact that im also able to think for myself really does not help me, since i myself am able to say that im fucked up socially, and those that are fucked up socially are fucked when it comes to the outer world. I have been showing a lot of signs of slowly becoming anorexic. I cant take compliments from anyone as i have such a low self esteem that i cant help but think people are joking.

What do i do? Seek professional help?

Hello, i wont say who i am or what age i am. I want to be anonymous. Sorry, my thoughts are scattered.

To be honest, if i wasn't a nerd i would probably be at an insane asylum, cause im fucked up. Im an extremely negative person, am very introvert and have serious anger issues. So if i wasn't at my computer all day and forgetting about my miserable existence i dont quite know if i would even be alive at this point.

Lets start from the beginning, i started school a year before children from my country normally would, i did this because me and my family moved to spain, and i started going to an international school. i went to this school for 6.5 years, and this is were most of my depression has its roots. You see, this school was international, so for the most part i was the only one from my country in my year. I also have a very.... different sense of humor. This meant that i didnt really get any friends. So i started using the pc, and played WoW. This made me even more of a weirdo, and people started hating me more.I was also very good in terms of grades, which didnt help. Quickly i became the stupid nerd that nobody liked. I was even told by a guy after i was forced to pick him for my team in cops and robbers that i was an idiot. The last half of a year i was there i started getting fed up, reacted back, and thus became even more hated. I was so happy when my parents told me i got to move back to denmark. Then we moved back to my home country. [spoiler]Shoutout to [url=http://www.sis.ac/]sotogrande international school[/url] for being retarded. I literally started shaking with rage writing this.[/spoiler]

So we came back to my home country and i went to a different kind of school, and there were nerds like me. But there were also assholes. Lots and lots of assholes. For every one friend ive made i have made about 3 enemies. I guess I should also say that every time i got really mad and lost my temper, it would be treated with anger and getting told off, making me hate myself more and more. People say that i should talk to people about it, but being extremely introvert makes this very hard. When puberty hit this got even worse, and i started getting even more mad at myself every time i lost my shit. Being told by a teacher how you've given someone a concussion after they've taunted you for 1.5 years and how bad and stupid your reaction is, it hurts.

Even online i never really got any attention, no one cared. Not online, nor offline. My parents didnt care, and to be frank my parents really dont like the way my life is turning out. The fact that im also able to think for myself really does not help me, since i myself am able to say that im fucked up socially, and those that are fucked up socially are fucked when it comes to the outer world. I have been showing a lot of signs of slowly becoming anorexic. I cant take compliments from anyone as i have such a low self esteem that i cant help but think people are joking.

What do i do? Seek professional help?
2
#2
46 Frags +

Seek professional help.

Seek professional help.
3
#3
11 Frags +

Find someone, ANYONE, you can talk with and vent to. If you can't, seek professional help.

Find someone, ANYONE, you can talk with and vent to. If you can't, seek professional help.
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#4
9 Frags +

Definitely seek professional help. If you're still in highschool go to the office and seek a counsellor. If you're in post-secondary any decent school usually offers free counselling. If you feel like your parents will understand what you're going through then give them a talk. Let them know about where you are in life and I'm sure they will help if they can.

Definitely seek professional help. If you're still in highschool go to the office and seek a counsellor. If you're in post-secondary any decent school usually offers free counselling. If you feel like your parents will understand what you're going through then give them a talk. Let them know about where you are in life and I'm sure they will help if they can.
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#5
8 Frags +
loljkSeek professional help.

this. and don't take this as a slap in the face, or him implying you are crazy, etc.

with your last sentence in mind, it appears that you have answered your own question. don't be embarrassed to reach out for professional help and support.

[quote=loljk]Seek professional help.[/quote]

this. and don't take this as a slap in the face, or him implying you are crazy, etc.

with your last sentence in mind, it appears that you have answered your own question. don't be embarrassed to reach out for professional help and support.
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#6
3 Frags +

you might want to call a hotline instead of going to see a counsellor face to face, since you're an introvert. it might be more comfortable for you and you probably don't want to be awkward in front of professional help... but if you feel that it is comfortable for you to see a counsellor (be it from your school or somewhere else), it would probably be more effective in helping you...

you might want to call a hotline instead of going to see a counsellor face to face, since you're an introvert. it might be more comfortable for you and you probably don't want to be awkward in front of professional help... but if you feel that it is comfortable for you to see a counsellor (be it from your school or somewhere else), it would probably be more effective in helping you...
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#7
9 Frags +

Hey buddy, wanna play some games? Also, you're going to be fine because you know the source of your problems and haven't taken any further action until you are sure that it's the right decision. I think you're naturally cautious of your situation, and it will help you move slowly towards building better self-esteem.

Hey buddy, wanna play some games? Also, you're going to be fine because you know the source of your problems and haven't taken any further action until you are sure that it's the right decision. I think you're naturally cautious of your situation, and it will help you move slowly towards building better self-esteem.
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#8
5 Frags +

get a therapist

and remember after high school or whatever its called in denmark you will literally never see any of those assholes ever again.

get a therapist

and remember after high school or whatever its called in denmark you will literally never see any of those assholes ever again.
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#9
-36 Frags +

smoke a bowl

smoke a bowl
10
#10
7 Frags +

You say your parents don't care about you, but that is not true. To your parents, you are their entire world. Don't let a couple of assholes put you down. Talk to them, and don't be embarrassed to seek help from them.

You say your parents don't care about you, but that is not true. To your parents, you are their entire world. Don't let a couple of assholes put you down. Talk to them, and don't be embarrassed to seek help from them.
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#11
-24 Frags +

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxlvyhEsvt1qfia8fo1_500.gif

[img]http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxlvyhEsvt1qfia8fo1_500.gif[/img]
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#12
10 Frags +

seeking professional help isn't wrong and shouldn't be the last resource
stuff happened to me but SINCE I'M TOO PROUD OF MYSELF, i delayed as much as i could to go to a psychologist, which i realized was pretty dumb of me, because it helped me so much
if you need an e-bud we can be buds

seeking professional help isn't wrong and shouldn't be the last resource
stuff happened to me but SINCE I'M TOO PROUD OF MYSELF, i delayed as much as i could to go to a psychologist, which i realized was pretty dumb of me, because it helped me so much
if you need an e-bud we can be buds
13
#13
2 Frags +

you know, i don't know what to tell you. from my point of view, from my experience, it doesn't get better. you get stronger. and while i may be far from able to be happy when i want, it helps to know there are people trying to help. people going through the same thing who can sympathize with you. there's wisdom and strength in numbers. there's not a single person on this earth that can truly make it on their own.

i'm here if you ever need it

you know, i don't know what to tell you. from my point of view, from my experience, it doesn't get better. you get stronger. and while i may be far from able to be happy when i want, it helps to know there are people trying to help. people going through the same thing who can sympathize with you. there's wisdom and strength in numbers. there's not a single person on this earth that can truly make it on their own.

[url=http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198044070635/]i'm here[/url] if you ever need it
14
#14
2 Frags +

find an outlet for your anger issues

something creative and constructive

find an outlet for your anger issues

something creative and constructive
15
#15
2 Frags +
thronesfind an outlet for your anger issues

something creative and constructive

+1 for this, I got into carpentry and shit when i was feeling down, DIY projects are really fun. If you don't have tools or a place to work, look for a tool library or a hackerspace in your city.

[quote=thrones]find an outlet for your anger issues

something creative and constructive[/quote]
+1 for this, I got into carpentry and shit when i was feeling down, DIY projects are really fun. If you don't have tools or a place to work, look for a tool library or a hackerspace in your city.
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#16
4 Frags +

Well I basically alias myself from being a depressed angry guy, but I've gone through 5 years of psychological help from a professional and it helped a lot. Gave me someone to vent to whenever I drove by and taught me a lot of stuff. I also found something I enjoy doing, boxing, I got to beat the anger out myself into someone else and I enjoyed it. Even getting hit let some anger out. Then I found music and learned to vent my feelings through the sounds I can make.

Finding a vent is a great thing if you want to keep it personal, but professional help is the best you can get.

Well I basically alias myself from being a depressed angry guy, but I've gone through 5 years of psychological help from a professional and it helped a lot. Gave me someone to vent to whenever I drove by and taught me a lot of stuff. I also found something I enjoy doing, boxing, I got to beat the anger out myself into someone else and I enjoyed it. Even getting hit let some anger out. Then I found music and learned to vent my feelings through the sounds I can make.

Finding a vent is a great thing if you want to keep it personal, but professional help is the best you can get.
17
#17
-6 Frags +

this sounds like you were socially awkward because you didn't know how to talk anyone and instead of trying grow as a person blamed other people for being bullies

this sounds like you were socially awkward because you didn't know how to talk anyone and instead of trying grow as a person blamed other people for being bullies
18
#18
2 Frags +

find people who have shit in common with you and go hang out with them

making friends isnt difficult but it is a lot of work

pretty worth it though

find people who have shit in common with you and go hang out with them

making friends isnt difficult but it is a lot of work

pretty worth it though
19
#19
0 Frags +
eeethis sounds like you were socially awkward because you didn't know how to talk anyone and instead of trying grow as a person blamed other people for being bullies

And it sounds like you're making a general assumption when you don't know the specific circumstances that caused his depression. Not to mention his different sense of humor and the difference of his nationality. Through personal experience, having a different accent and physical make-up can make a huge impact socially.

[quote=eee]this sounds like you were socially awkward because you didn't know how to talk anyone and instead of trying grow as a person blamed other people for being bullies[/quote]
And it sounds like you're making a general assumption when you don't know the specific circumstances that caused his depression. Not to mention his different sense of humor and the difference of his nationality. Through personal experience, having a different accent and physical make-up can make a huge impact socially.
20
#20
-3 Frags +
boppeteeethis sounds like you were socially awkward because you didn't know how to talk anyone and instead of trying grow as a person blamed other people for being bulliesAnd it sounds like you're making a general assumption when you don't know the specific circumstances that caused his depression.

and so is everyone else

it's shitty having no friends, but after a certain point if you want companionship you have to acknowledge that something about you makes you come off wrong, and unless you start being introspective and trying to grow, nothing will change

its hard to feel sorry for the kind of people who can manage to spend 18 years without learning how to be social, and then complain about being alone, without ever trying something new

[quote=boppet][quote=eee]this sounds like you were socially awkward because you didn't know how to talk anyone and instead of trying grow as a person blamed other people for being bullies[/quote]
And it sounds like you're making a general assumption when you don't know the specific circumstances that caused his depression.[/quote]
and so is everyone else

it's shitty having no friends, but after a certain point if you want companionship you have to acknowledge that something about you makes you come off wrong, and unless you start being introspective and trying to grow, nothing will change

its hard to feel sorry for the kind of people who can manage to spend 18 years without learning how to be social, and then complain about being alone, without ever trying something new
21
#21
3 Frags +

I'm sure a lot of people on here would love to play some video games with you man.

Anyways, I would look for someone you can talk to and try to discuss your problems with them.

I'm sure a lot of people on here would love to play some video games with you man.

Anyways, I would look for someone you can talk to and try to discuss your problems with them.
22
#22
1 Frags +

sometimes i get down too man. If i'm not playing well in hockey, or if i feel like all of my "friends" don't actually care about me, or i feel like my parents don't really care about me, all reasons why i get down, and it sucks. But sometimes you just have to find one person and just talk, don't even let them say a word till the end, just tell them everything. I have been fortunate enough to find a few people in my life that actually care about me, and i know you can find people like this too. I know you'll be fine in the end, add me if you ever wanna talk about anything, from tf2 to your darkest secrets, i'm here for you if you want.

sometimes i get down too man. If i'm not playing well in hockey, or if i feel like all of my "friends" don't actually care about me, or i feel like my parents don't really care about me, all reasons why i get down, and it sucks. But sometimes you just have to find one person and just talk, don't even let them say a word till the end, just tell them everything. I have been fortunate enough to find a few people in my life that actually care about me, and i know you can find people like this too. I know you'll be fine in the end, add me if you ever wanna talk about anything, from tf2 to your darkest secrets, i'm here for you if you want.
23
#23
2 Frags +

When i feel bad or i don't know what to do in a situation, i talk to my best friend, she helped me a lot and i learned a lot of things, sometimes your friends can't really help you and they will just listen to you, but it feels good if you have atleast someone to talk.

But when it comes to something serious i would talk to my parents, but in your case, if they don't really care like you said, you need to seek for professional help, i went to a psychologist for about 1 year and a half and it helped me so much that i could achieve the things i wanted and beat my fears.

One more thing, you should do stuff to distract you and entertain you, like going to the gim, do excersices, it helps you to build a better self steem and feel good about you.

When i feel bad or i don't know what to do in a situation, i talk to my best friend, she helped me a lot and i learned a lot of things, sometimes your friends can't really help you and they will just listen to you, but it feels good if you have atleast someone to talk.

But when it comes to something serious i would talk to my parents, but in your case, if they don't really care like you said, you need to seek for professional help, i went to a psychologist for about 1 year and a half and it helped me so much that i could achieve the things i wanted and beat my fears.

One more thing, you should do stuff to distract you and entertain you, like going to the gim, do excersices, it helps you to build a better self steem and feel good about you.
24
#24
3 Frags +

Never forget that there's always going to be people out there that want to help. Where there is life, there is love, and where there is love, there is life.
Hang in there, bud.

Never forget that there's always going to be people out there that want to help. Where there is life, there is love, and where there is love, there is life.
Hang in there, bud.
25
#25
3 Frags +

From someone who has seen this and dealt with it over the last 6 months, this is what you need to do.

Go to your normal doctor as soon as you possibly can. You may feel like not going, going later, not getting your parents involved or that it is not that big of a deal to warrant going, I do not care. Call them now, leave a message or call them tomorrow if they are closed right this second (and for no other reason). When dealing with depression, when you least want to do something like this is when you NEED to do it the most.

When you get to the doctor, explain to him/her what your feelings and actions are (example being not eating and why you don't feel like eating). It would be unusual for them to ask you about your past so if you feel embarrassed, it shouldn't be brought up (if they do ask though, tell them). They will tell you what to do from there, do exactly what they say and in a timely manner.

You can add me here, I can tell you things that have helped me and other people in your situation but until you go to the doctor I will tell you nothing but to go to the doctor immediately.

From someone who has seen this and dealt with it over the last 6 months, this is what you need to do.

Go to your normal doctor as soon as you possibly can. You may feel like not going, going later, not getting your parents involved or that it is not that big of a deal to warrant going, I do not care. Call them now, leave a message or call them tomorrow if they are closed right this second (and for no other reason). When dealing with depression, when you least want to do something like this is when you NEED to do it the most.

When you get to the doctor, explain to him/her what your feelings and actions are (example being not eating and why you don't feel like eating). It would be unusual for them to ask you about your past so if you feel embarrassed, it shouldn't be brought up (if they do ask though, tell them). They will tell you what to do from there, do exactly what they say and in a timely manner.

You can add me [url=http://steamcommunity.com/id/C_Caveman/]here[/url], I can tell you things that have helped me and other people in your situation but until you go to the doctor I will tell you nothing but to go to the doctor immediately.
26
#26
-2 Frags +

I love this eee guy he speaks my language!

I love this eee guy he speaks my language!
27
#27
6 Frags +
omzsmoke a bowl

responsible drug use is fine but never use drugs to deal with any problem even if it's "just weed"

[quote=omz]smoke a bowl[/quote]


responsible drug use is fine but never use drugs to deal with any problem even if it's "just weed"
28
#28
1 Frags +

You need to find what you're gonna do with your life and what you like to do. Everyone has something special that makes everyone a unique person. I know how hard is to find this and the "school stage" of our life is pretty fucked up but when you figure it out your life will make sense. never think about take your life away again! maybe you should try to do something different, go to the park, write a poem, try to play a musical instrument, etc. If you have anger problems try to pratice a sport or play drums.
And talk to your friends or someone that you feel comfortable with (teacher or your parents for example), they might be nicer than you think.

You need to find what you're gonna do with your life and what you like to do. Everyone has something special that makes everyone a unique person. I know how hard is to find this and the "school stage" of our life is pretty fucked up but when you figure it out your life will make sense. never think about take your life away again! maybe you should try to do something different, go to the park, write a poem, try to play a musical instrument, etc. If you have anger problems try to pratice a sport or play drums.
And talk to your friends or someone that you feel comfortable with (teacher or your parents for example), they might be nicer than you think.
29
#29
-9 Frags +

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30
#30
-1 Frags +

It took me a large portion of my life to figure out most people have no idea what they are talking about. "Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the fuck you were gonna do anyway." Trust your instincts but don't make the wrong choices because of fear.

It took me a large portion of my life to figure out most people have no idea what they are talking about. "Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the fuck you were gonna do anyway." Trust your instincts but don't make the wrong choices because of fear.
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