Some of us didn't do so well in our matches so I'm gonna write some nice guy stuff and try to be encouraging.
When my team played our first scrim of the day I did a pretty good job. I 2v1'd the enemy scouts, watch'd the flank, cleaned shit up, got medic/demo picks, and every other good thing you can do as scout. I was consistently playing well throughout the whole game and I felt great about it. It was a big confidence booster for my ESEA match.
We all slowly joined the server like some sort of simile with snails or sloths. I looked at the other team's players, felt pretty confident in my abilities, and typed ".ready". When the match started I slowly ran to mid as a scout while going up and down through the ground. The first mid was amazing! I walked over a sticky, got focused, and died about 10 seconds into the fight. After this happened I started being really hard on myself.
"capn ur so bad u died 10 seconds into the fite lrn2movement"
"capn a 0:1 kdr is an infinite negative kdr roflusuk"
My frustration grew to be as big as Odissius' desired FOV. Thats 105 degrees. That's some pretty hot headed frustration ;D Because of this frustration, I was not paying attention to the game or keeping a clear mind for my open level gamesense to flourish in.
By the last 5 minutes of the match, I finally snapped out of it. I made some good decisions, waved my massive dick, and had some pretty good DM'ing moments. All that I really did was calm down, stretch my arms, take a deep breath, and blog about my feelings on teamfortress.tv during my respawn time.
Unfortunately, it was too late for me to help save the match for my team. Whats important though is that I learned a lesson. Don't get mad at yourself for screwing up. Think about how you screwed up, but don't beat yourself up over it. A lot of the time all that it takes to hit a few more shots is to just loosen up. Even if you or your team didn't do a great job on your first match just remember that you still have a bunch more coming up and lots of time to improve and that you can always just blame the esea servers for being shitty.
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tldr chill out you have time to get better dont be mad at urself