its like this small pet peeve of mine when someone uses an alias like "snow" as if thats not currently in use by 50k people

https://play.esea.net/index.php?s=forums&d=topic&id=1189868

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i dont know what it is but tf2 just makes me agitated and upset these days, and when i take it out on other players it only makes the game worse for everyone i play with. if i start playing the game in a bad mood it comes out in how well i play and how i treat people, which is awful and not ok.

in a combination of the issues i had with team structuring and my own minimal self-confidence, i tilted, soft-threw, or otherwise dragged my feet through about a month of cumber scrims. i wasnt enjoying playing any of them (wubs found this out immediately, poor guy was team therapist), and for a while i kinda dreaded opening tf2 just to play an awful scrim that would make me feel worse. i only wasted my teams time when i couldve addressed the issues earlier and made the scrims worth something. we had our issues, but my teammates didnt deserve that.

the other day i was up 10-5 against someone in solly v solly ammomod when they went pyro. instead of handling the situation in a decent way i removed and flamed him. i dont know why this was my first option and i instantly regretted it, but the issue still stands that knee-jerk bm is something i dont know why i do, and i really wished i didnt. truth be told, i really dont want to yell at anyone or start shit, which makes the fact that i do bm, and how little control i seem to have over it, even more upsetting to me. yall are really cool people and dont need the worst pocket in open™ going off on you like that.

i could probably assume that this post's just gonna be the next juju apology thread, where the next time i start getting moody and acting up you'll all point and laugh, but i genuinely hate how ive been acting. I've just felt empty irl for the better part of a year, and i decided to...

...to give me something to feel less shitty about, which was a huge mistake. ive had a lot of friends tell me to just seek therapy which sounds like a good first step, but i dont know where to start.

i miss the 2016 gritoma that couldnt hit shit but he enjoyed playing tf2 and enjoyed playing games with other people and couldnt understand why people would bm so he didnt.

i really want to thank you for putting a lot of my own concerns into words. at least i know that im not alone in feeling this way about the game.

i apologize for the long unnecessary emo retard essay. good morning east coast :)

if you could add the option to include your desired div on the lft list, i think it would be a lot more effective

can i get in on that? what's boar's ign?

is there a TFTV CC?

if not, do you guys wanna make one?

itd for sure make the grind less cheeks for me

im more of a "get enough agility to do horror from the deep" kind of player

https://i.imgur.com/O2VRaOn.png agony

this seems like a bball fleshed-out to include more than 1 class

ngl having glitch and i be ur soldiers would be pretty large imo

theres really people out there trying to make excuses for bm other than "i got mad in video game"

while we're on the topic has anyone ever seen glitch try to aim rockets

he throws his mouse off his desk and hits triples

its truly a master practicing his craft

can we make an addendum to this post to acknowledge the rare breed of niche virgin that stands bats all game

bonus points if you jump spire and they just spam you out waiting for you to bomb them again

thank you for listening to my musical .ly

jon gruden achieving levels of tank that cleveland had only dreamed of