I went to pick something up later at night yesterday and come home to find that someone's taken the spot I was parked in. No big deal, I start looking for some other place to park, and find a spot just big enough for my car in front of this woman who parked her Accord right in the middle of what was most definitely two car's worth of parking space. So I start parking, and the Accord starts wailing its panic siren. It turns off and then on again any time I move, pretty obviously being triggered from somewhere by a fob, because I'm like 5 feet away from the car and the siren is delayed by obvious reaction times any time I move. Eventually I'm like fuck this shit, go park in an even smaller space further away, and then come back to take a photo of the Accord's license plate to send the image to the building manager to tell this woman to either buy her own parking spot or street park like a proper human being.
She starts yelling at me from the balcony, and I'm just basically like, what the fuck is your problem? And she's like "well you were going to hit my car." And I was like bitch, are you for fucking real? First of all, YOU parking like this is why it would have made parking for me difficult in the first place (I still wouldn't have hit her car, but it was a small parking space, and me and one other person in the immediate neighbourhood are probably the only two people with cars small enough to fit the space she left). Second of all, you're not the only one who cares about your car, and I have no interest in hitting your car because it means my pristine, washed-weekly, polished and waxed car has to make contact with your giant piece of shit that's taking up two parking spots. And she's like "well I've been hit before". Oh that's nice, guess what - me too. That's the fucking risk you take when you street park and don't pony up for your own parking stall. I have scratches on my fenders because a few idiots weren't careful. I still fucking park like a considerate individual, leave larger spaces for larger cars, and make sure to try and make as much space near me so that another neighbor can try parking their car there. Nobody actively tries to hit other people's vehicles. Like, are you for fucking real?
And of course she's sitting there chain-smoking, making sure nobody can park their car next to hers.
Maybe if you put the cigarettes down for one second, Betty Boop, you'd be able to afford the insurmountable $25 a month that gives you access to your own ~private~ parking stall away from all of the ~plebeians~.