Im genuinely impressed you were able to spot my condition just from watching my stream. The attentiveness and the fact that you care means a lot to me. But yes the truth is for over a year my immune system has started to attack me (it's extremely strong I almost never get sick). The nail clubbing has been happening for over 6-9 months now and when I showed my GP he freaked the fuck out and told me something is terribly wrong with me. The answers helped me understand why I lost all my chakra, why I can barely stream anymore, why Im always just sleeping in bed, my content has been dwindling down along with my health.
While I look good on the outside, my organ health has been deteriorating. This has nothing to do with the TF2 and gaming. It's more to do with the obvious horrible life decisions I've made which Im sure many people know about.
Ive always been an open book and talked about my shit cause theres alot of people in this community that can relate, including some of you at the top (my brothers). My doctor told me I could have potential risk for cancer and severe inflammation everywhere else in my body. Immune system is also going haywire either attacking me or something else that's inside. For about 2 months now my doc told me to go 4 ultrasounds done of my neck, thyroid, lungs and stomach along with 2 xrays and an 8 vial blood test. I still haven't gotten the full results but Im very scared which is why I didn't tell anyone.
The one thing is for sure, Im so sorry to all my fans and supporters and the community, I have no choice but to stop playing for now until I find out and fully treat what's going on. I know yall look up to me but I did this to myself because I wasn't strong enough to handle my mental health and I just played through it all while neglecting the holy vessel I was blessed with. I know a lot of you look up to me, but Im still just a human whos no where near perfect. I still have a lot of work to do and I promise Im gonna heal up. Til further notice.