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MAD LUXURIOUS play bed, wed, behead
posted in News
Recurse
January 8, 2020

Over the course of the offseason, MAD LUXURIOUS have lost their previous two pickups, exile and pelt, and have picked up nate rivers and vaati in their stead.

This marks vaati's third consecutive season in an Invite division, just taking fourth place with Glove World last season. However, nate rivers will be making their Invite debut, having not played on a team since ESEA Season 30, after losing in the first round of Intermediate playoffs. The team has also managed to halfway drag pheLon our of retirement to serve as their coach.

As a team-building exercise, we asked the team who they would each ...have intercourse with?, marry, and kill:

pauldogg: I'm fucking okie, killing vaati, and marrying phelon

edward: vaati, pauldoge, okie :thumbs_up:

okiewaka: I’m having sexual intercourse with luc for bed and breakfast reasons, marrying paul cuz we have shit in common, and killing vaati cuz he’s competition.

pheLon: fuck nate because he's so mysterious and prob a freak, marry luc for the cooking and paul can be our son, kill vaati (hazing to the group he’ll get over it)

nate rivers: Uh...Fuck paul, marry phelon, kill okie. I might be having second thoughts, but that's what came to my head.

vaati: fuck paul cuz he's black, marry okie, kill nate. ez

lucrative: I'm gonna fuck okie because he's the best looking, marry phelon because we are very close and he's financially stable (the rest are just neets), and I'm killing bwelp even though he's not on the team anymore.

After building a little more team chemistry, MAD LUXURIOUS will be going into the season with:

  • Scout: nate rivers
  • Scout: ed
  • Roamer: okiewaka
  • Pocket: pauldogg
  • Demoman: vaati
  • Medic: lucrative
  • Coach: pheLon
1
#1
23 Frags +

i hate bwelp too

i hate bwelp too
2
#2
24 Frags +

i too would kill bwelp

i too would kill bwelp
3
#3
29 Frags +

vaati: fuck paul cuz he's black

vaati: fuck paul cuz he's black
4
#4
1 Frags +

Go okiewaka!

Go okiewaka!
5
#5
13 Frags +

Keep that up, vaati, and you'll get an RGL ban

Keep that up, vaati, and you'll get an RGL ban
6
#6
1 Frags +

oklahomawakeboarder

oklahomawakeboarder
7
#7
26 Frags +

wait wtf

wait wtf
8
#8
-18 Frags +

no one on this roster is familiar to me, so im screwed

no one on this roster is familiar to me, so im screwed
9
#9
14 Frags +

All 6 of these players have been around since the dawn of time

All 6 of these players have been around since the dawn of time
10
#10
10 Frags +

vaati must die

vaati must die
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