pregame wank

if i get a random boner i dont want that shit brushing up against my pants and distracting me ya dig

deal with it before and you wont go afk pushing last to have a quickie

an hour of dm followed by an hour of meditation with only the sound of my miniature waterfall, filled with water from my homeland flowing behind me

with precisely 15 minutes left until match time I begin the ritual dance of my people, where perfect execution of the steps and moves will take exactly 15 minutes

I then return to my computer and tell my team of the visions that came to me while meditating

I plunge my hands into the gaping cavity in the wild hog I slaughter before every match in order to infuse myself with the energy of the majestic beast

my hands slick with blood I place my hands on my mouse and wasd keys and enter a state of perfect oneness with my peripherals

a bloodcurdling scream, in a voice not my own, emerges from my throat as my eyes open to the eternity of the universe

then I click the esea client icon

i feel like playing with viewmodels on with soldier helps me aim rockets

edit: don't know how i didn't notice the last post was on the 6th. whoops :/

I play better drunk, so I only play drunk. Unfortunately, I'm complete shit.

if i don't exorcise before tf2 the ghosts will make me do bad

There are no mediocre players with an underscore at the end of their name, they are either good or awful...

it always sucked when I changed my name in mge and shit on everyone, then i realize no one knows its me, so i change my name back, then i get shit on

alias make you better - scientifically proven

Call that I'm popping uber, die before I manage to click.

http://youtu.be/DiI4R9EBjEo

that i'm only good at games when i haven't been playing them but haven't forgotten how to play yet.