FuxxThat's precisely why we need to respect and support anyone who comes out to their fullest extent and give a good old asskicking to anyone who doesn't. Judging from the horrified and sympathetic reactions that the community undertakes every time this sort of thing comes up it's not unfeasible to think that we're that far away from that point, is it? You ought to defend the victim, that's the bloody fucking point. Now you want to keep quiet and allow more abuse to happen? I'm terribly sorry that in your mother's case this wasn't possible, it's inhumanly revolting that any criminal gets to go unpunished and worse: that the victim is reduced. But it is precisely because it is that inhumanly revolting that these abusers ought to be dealt with one way or another. Ideally by the police, through evidence, through the instruments of a nation's Law. Turns out that there's a history going on here, you have a literal rapist in your midst, or had until relatively recently. Console having the courage to speak up did more than anything else, because now the bastard's gone for good, hopefully. That you can't deny.The point being made is not that it is good for people to stay quiet
the point being made is staying quiet out of fear is an understandable thing, especially given the circumstances.
before I talked to anyone about this, I genuinely feared for my life that the only career I have ever considered as worth putting time into, esports and I genuinely loved was going to crash down, especially knowing how many people I was manipulated to believe that trusted dashner over uberchain. I feared so much that all it would take was one peep out of me and with their influences in FACEIT, Blast Pro Series, and Waveform, that I would never work in esports again.
I only came out after reaching out to uberchain directly, sharing my experiences, and being encouraged that i would be helped and supported.
When you are victimized, especially in a serialized manner,you fear every possibility after you have been strung along for so long. Assuming that it is as easy as just talking about it, even ignoring the immense emotional pain that's haunted me the past few weeks, you are doing nothing but harming already traumatized victims as Geel pointed out.
Console, you are a heroic person for having the courage to do what you did. You ought to be admired. It takes considerable amount of strength to do what you did and at the end of the day it still poses a risk. Sympathy, compassion, all of these are things that I've always defended and will continue to defend. Not once have I claimed that it was easy or free of its consequences. Your courage should serve as an example to all others.
My issue is that there are a series of problems that extend beyond an abuser being abusive. It is unquestionable that if the atmosphere is one that tries to stigmatize the victim then this atmosphere needs to be cleansed at once. If the atmosphere punishes the victim then the victims won't speak out. If the victims do not speak out then the abuse remains and bad guys go unpunished. It is not that the victims should be forced to speak against their will, but rather given the support necessary to do so. Speaking up is important, but it cannot happen if the atmosphere does not allow for it.
At a deeper level you ought to understand that the correct thing to do - and precisely that is the path you chose to take - is to speak up.
At a deeper level you ought to understand that if you are afraid to speak up then burden is on the community to impose an atmosphere of respect and support.
If this doesn't happen, abuse persists. Do not massacre me out in public for speaking the truth, rather massacre your peers for contributing to the toxicity that imposes an atmosphere of fear. You cannot possibly disagree with this, to do so is to misguide frustration that should rightfully fall on the mechanisms which allowed for this to happen. The moral conclusions are clear: expose abusers, support the victims. If you disagree then this only further confirms my point: victims don't feel enough at ease.
I just want the abuse to end.