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Signed Up December 24, 2015
Last Posted May 2, 2024 at 6:44 AM
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#1 My New Thread / 02/05/24 in The Dumpster

Hi everyone. I made a light hearted parody of Future Brock's vid and I wanted to share it.



posted 2 weeks ago
#34 Songs you only associate with TF2 in Off Topic

Ratatat discography

posted 1 month ago
#11 a new rule for all tf2 servers in TF2 General Discussion
TheBabaBossWhat do you think

I think your ahh should be in the dumpster! That said, I am curious what the "biggest rule" is.

posted 1 month ago
#4 Help in The Dumpster
scratchhtake my hand

I promise I will as soon as I get out of this mess…

Here ya go little buddy

Perfect! But—uh oh…


There's a European just outside, his animal unleashëd. Europeans go crazy for threads, and I'm covered in them. It's too risky. You'll have to distract him so I can climb out.

posted 10 months ago
#1 Help in The Dumpster

I was sniffing around the dumpster for funny threads and I fell in!
If you can help me get out, I will show you something incredible.


posted 10 months ago
#1 Congratulations on recent threads in The Dumpster

Pretty much every day, once I've checked my Socials and News, I hop on here and check the threads while I prepare to enter the right mindset for a long day's gaming or just sitting around at the computer. It's one of the only places you can really do that anymore. It's nice to have a forum in this day and age. (Some people don't think so though. There's something called the World Economic Forum which some people seem to think is Cuck/Shill. I think they just have Discord bias.) Anyway, I've become quite used to checking the threads, clicking maybe one with my Logitech G703, remembering I read it yesterday, then going back to Twitter to make something up about shitting myself. But recently all that has changed, and I just wanted to congratulate the users of Teamfortress.TV for the spate of interesting TF2 threads looking back at fond memories and debating the present course of game strategy and I hope to see more.


I'm saying this and I'm saying it in Mario's voice.

posted about a year ago
#11 Do you upvote yourself? in Site Discussion
row_npc behaviour

If you insult me again I will take you from +5 to +4 >:(

posted about a year ago
#9 Do you upvote yourself? in Site Discussion

I usually just boost all posts in the direction the people have chosen, whether it's mine or someone else's. The only conscious upfragging/downfragging I do is to make sequential patterns or round numbers or punish my enemies

posted about a year ago
#13 im bored in Off Topic

Shut up in here

posted about a year ago
#1 Hello everyone in The Dumpster


posted about a year ago
#54 wats yr fav old-school tf2 vid? in TF2 General Discussion



posted about a year ago
#1 TOP 5 TEAMFORTRESS.TV POSTS OF 2017 in The Dumpster

I was looking through my stuff on my hard drives. Data, images, videos, music. Weird and wonderful things. Incredible sights. Mysterious sounds. Beautiful women. And five of the best posts on a certain website forum...

The posts are old, but they have lost none of their charm. They made me laugh at the time and in a way they make me cry now because of all the dead links and edit-nuked posts. Enjoy!


posted about 2 years ago
#8 how do i becomee a more successful forum user in Off Topic

Hello elliott (I know him too),

I hope you are well since deleting me from steam. I am fine.

Your bait is usually masterful, but you are often snide and unpleasant and that can deter readers from upfragging you. In addition, I notice you haven't posted for about five months. My advice to you is to post more consistently, and to be more nice. Any other advice is probably fraudulent. All forums are on an endless downward spiral from their geneses. Seven years ago, threads were made decrying the quality of trolls and jokers compared to the days of gotfrag. Today I am sure most would make a great personal or physical sacrifice to inundate the barren dumpster with posters like stultus or pankey man. With that in mind, striving to get good immediate reception here, like anywhere, is pointless, because you will only ever be fully appreciated one or more generations after your final post, when your surviving contemporary detractors are faced with a legion of funhaver1998s and lose substantial will to laugh and hope. It all evens out in the end. What you leave behind on the Earth or internet is what matters.

With love,

posted about 2 years ago
#8 what if the scout had gunboats in TF2 General Discussion

Great question. I agree with turbochad69 (Newton's whatever aside, lost interest there), and also with some other guys that we mustn't forget Scout is only 1 inch shorter than Soldier (5'10 to 5'11, so both fairly tall), runs at a constant 17mph, and he can double jump (triple or even more after his morning crit-a-coffee). Just because he's pathetic we can't just assume he has weak legs.

When I saw this question my mind went as it often does to The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time -- the greatest Nintendo 64 title, the greatest speedgame of all time, and a direct precursor to Team Fortress 2 in that it pioneered sticky jumping and ubercharge, ironic frag videos, constant idiotic ruleset drama, random crits, hackusations, jump maps, mge mains, the thing where you taunt next to someone and it looks like youre humping them, friendlies, someone competing virtually undefeated for 10+ years, rktking, and some stuff I can't link like the invite illuminati. All this can buoy us along to a vaguer, previously-unthought connection:

Show Content

The Iron Boots.
For comparison:

Show Content

As the dialogue goes when you find them:

dialogueSo heavy, you can't swim. So heavy, you can't float.

Indeed these boots -- or rather the iron -- are -- or rather is -- heavy enough to drag link to the bottom of a lake, to ward against the wind of huge fans, and to artificially extend total playtime by at least an hour. They slow Link's typical loping gait to a ham-footed brass-beast march on land (directly halving his walk speed from 9 units per frame to 4.5), but for some reason (perhaps Newton's whatever law) they speed him up when walking underwater.

Let's compare the four victims of these boots, shall we, being the legs of the two wearers? Yes

Show Content

Now, let's use a consistent stat across games to compare the physical capabilities of the three characters in question.

The Scout, as some of us will already know, comes to us with 125 health, buffable to 185. The Soldier comes with 200, buffable to 300.

Link is obviously more complicated to work out. We can start by taking his "canon health" from OOT: 3 hearts, 'buffable' via Heart Pieces and Containers to 20. But if we're to assume that the smallest unit of health is the same across games, then we have to carve Link's hearts up to get the true value: not only into the quarters you might have assumed, but actually into invisible sixteenths, which the game rounds up into quarters in order to display them in the heart meter. Assuming 1/16 of a heart translates to 1 TF2 health, Link would start off with 48 health, buffable to 320. He is therefore 2.60417 times weaker than the Scout at his base health, and 4.17 times weaker than the Soldier, who is also Counter Strike 1.6 times stronger than the Scout. But we must consider overheal and Heart Containers both: at their maximum potentials, Link comes off the best, just edging the Soldier and screaming ahead of the Scout by 1.72973 times. What does this mean?

Anyway, we can increase our understanding of Link's vitality by looking at additional appearances of the same incarnation in different games. In Soulcalibur II, one of the greatest fighting games ever, Link appears in an incarnation one must assume is around the age of OOT's "Adult Link", but seemingly from the split timeline where he was sent in his child body with his adult memories in order to prevent Ganondorf from obtaining the Triforce, leading to the 'Child Timeline' series of games, consisting of Majora's Mask, Twilight Princess, Link's Crossbow Training, and Four Swords Adventures for the Game Boy Advance and GameCube both. I put it to you that this Link is roughly halfway between his appearance in Majora's Mask and his appearance as the Hero's Shade in Twilight Princess. (You may be thinking 'but that puts the Hero's Shade in his 30s!', in which case I will destroy you with this simple fact: he was slain in combat.) In this game, Link's health, like everyone else's, is 240. Unfortunately there is no record of this instance of Link wearing the Iron Boots, but we can see that this Link increased his base health by 192 points, equivalent to 12 extra hearts, for 15 total. Purely from dungeon boss Heart Containers, Link will gain 8 hearts over the course of OOT -- and there are 4 to gain in Majora's Mask, so it is to be assumed that canonically, Link did not find any Pieces of Heart, never reached his 'max health', and ONLY increased his vitality by defeating the 12 relevant bosses in his two N64 games.

All this suggests Link's health around the time we see him wear the Iron Boots (between the Ice Cavern and Water Temple, brief fan-resisting in Ganon's Castle notwithstanding) is 9 hearts, or 144 in universal (TF2) units (U(TF2)U).

So what can we infer from this?
It's hard to say. I'm not sure what infer means. On the face of it, it would seem that as the Scout has less HP than Link (forma del templo del agua), his move speed would therefore be reduced by MORE than half if he wore the Gunboats. You may be thinking: 'but Scout can double jump!' The sad ugly unavoidable truth is Link's single jump is infinitely higher, and Scout is a certified, licensed weakling.

edit: ubercharge evidence

posted about 2 years ago
#15 ESL and Faceit bought by Saudi Arabia in Esports

is islamaphobia a bannable offense in esl?

posted about 2 years ago
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