krphyxzwlpz
Account Details
SteamID64 76561198070136627
SteamID3 [U:1:109870899]
SteamID32 STEAM_0:1:54935449
Country Finland
Signed Up December 6, 2014
Last Posted December 7, 2018 at 9:24 PM
Posts 15 (0 per day)
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#15 Kami LFT in Recruitment (looking for team)

please pick this man up for your team, he's good, he's great. If he still lft by christmas y'all gonna perish in my eternal flame

posted 3 days ago
#4 ashley LFT open in Recruitment (looking for team)

good scout good gamer good teammate, has lots of passion for the game and for competition, and compassion for her teammates! An all-around quality gamer. Pick her up at your local wholefoods.

posted 3 days ago
#1 AFC 14 Div 1 GF: xiao vs. The Chess Foundation in Events

poggers

posted 1 week ago
#1 nae nae name change in Requests

can i get my name changed to krphyxzwlpz (this time with a 'z')

posted 1 week ago
#8 Prograde appreciation thread in Off Topic

stop bully

posted 1 week ago
#3 name change uwu in Requests

:< I made that for my steam alt. rip rusemaster-pauladeen

posted 1 week ago
#1 name change uwu in Requests

from rusemaster-pauladeen (which is totally epic btw if someone wants it just lmk)
to krphyxzwlps (dont laugh)

posted 1 week ago
#3 LFP open Demo and subs s30 in Recruitment (looking for players)

i can probably be a sub haha me epic gamer 8)

posted 3 weeks ago
#11 Looking 4 E-GF in The Dumpster

looking for e-bf to dominate me on various mge maps
add me if ur into traps haha

posted 1 month ago
#2 Discussion on Cute Girls. in The Dumpster

thx for linking my cosplays!!

posted 1 month ago
#2 last minute lft s29 open in Recruitment (looking for team)

this gamer is not toxic i can tell you that, right now. add him to your collection if that interests you, he's pretty chill dude 8)

posted 3 months ago
#1 tHE tHIRD pART oF my STorY in The Dumpster

Avery star and jerma christmas

by rusemaster-pauladeen, 34s ago
Literature / Fan Fiction / Romance

AVERY STAR AND jERMA CHRISTMAS
get it bcuz "a very" haha

If you’ve been following the critically acclaimed starxjerma fanfiction series by the master of neo-classical literature, “rusemaster-pauladeen”, you will remember that star_ lives in almost CEASELESS distress and abuse. Ever since that fateful day in “peenybutt adventure”, he has been confined to jerma’s basement, where he lives out his days sustaining on urine and lubricated squash that he eats in reverse up his ass and out his mouth through a secret, ancient japanese technique that he learned from his girfriend. His sole beacon of hope in life is that one day the My Little Ponies© of myth and legend will come and wisk him away into a life of wonderment and fantasy.
Christmas eve was upon them, and star_ slept restlessly due to nightmares of ground beef and mal3la and cheese pizza. Christmas day was the day that Jerma had christened for extra-special atrocious beef jerky butt spankings, and star_ usually did not make it past noon without pausing for fresh, non gamer ass air, which prompted even more anussery from Jerma.
The morning dawn spelt different tides, star_ soon realized, as he did not awake to the egregious ænus expansion that was typical of this time of day. He rubbed the night from his eyes, and sat up in bed, still unsteady from the previous nights’ pick up game of Television Frontdoor 2. He went about his normal daily routine of Roblox, lubing, and reverse mouth shit eating anus squash, when he noticed that the sound of cars driving by outside, that he usually used to gauge whether there were other people on the planet, weren’t there.
He cautiously left the safety of the heavily boarded up cellar door to the grass outside, to discover that the rest of the neighborhood seemed to be totally deserted! He was overjoyed! Jerma had no doubt been torn down the 9 levels of hell in some form of biblical rapture event! He could finally beat him at lethal league! Star_ kissed the sweet earth and felt the emptiness of the sky and felt the rising and falling of his chest and he was man.
“Why hello there mister!” a hearty appleseeded voice beckoned from the road.
Star_ jumped and turned to discover a group of 6 multicolored ponies standing in front of his house, waving him over to them. His steady, hesitant walk soon turned into a brisk jog as his eyes melted to tears at the sight of them, wrapping them all in a firm embrace.
They, who would be his beautiful, loving companions in his long happy life, without the burden of other people in his world. Other people did not understand him; could not appreciate him; did not love him. They, on the other hand, were the warm, loving, My Little Ponies©, and would never make him pug with ma3la or sex him in the butt unless he kindof wanted them to do that.
And the SEX! How could he forget the sex! They would no doubt fulfill any and all perverse, deviant urges he could muster. Hot, steamy orgies with the whole of them! Personal, tender nights with each one of them alone! Twilight no doubt held a whole host of magical concoctions and spells designed for racy and lustful transformations and augmentations for maximum pleasure. The coming years spelled a personal heaven on earth for star_. Merry Christmas indeed!
“HIHIHIHIHI this is going to be so much FUN!” the pink party pony squealed, excitedly bounding up and down in star_’s warm embrace. “It’s just gonna be the seven of us for the time being! We’re gonna explore the WORLD and we’re gonna have so many adventures and just...WHEEEEEE”. Pinky began bouncing in a circle around the group.
“Oh you are truly the GENTLEMEN, dear, but we simply MUST do something about those clothes... and that hair...” Rarity bellowed, voice smooth and soft as velvet fabric.
“Um...Hi...” Fluttershy muttered, eyes making their way up star’s curvaceous form.
“Hello there! We’ve been waiting for you!” Twilight stated, strait as a ruler. “You’ve finally made it! You got everything you’ve ever wanted. You have the whole world to yourself, you have those you love more than anything else, you have nothing to lose.”
“Yeah” Pinky piped in. “Now this way you’ll never have to work to finding someone who truly completes you! You’ll just have us: a couple of multicolored fleshlights to play with until you die or we die, and this feeling of emptiness will torture you for the rest of your life!” Pinkie’s voice remained eerily cheerful and stagnant. “You’ll never have to make the decision whether to spend the rest of your life with this other person, and you’ll never have to get the feeling of unbelieveable, confident, satisfaction as you look deep into their eyes and they say ‘Yes!’. You’ll never have to create another human being with this person, and wonder about their potential and possibility, and watch them grow and develop their personality, and you’ll never get to watch this beautiful, intelligent individual you made accomplish something, or even grow to something greater than yourself. You’ll never have to grow old with someone you truly love and watch the irreversible march of time sweep in new generations and experiences and advances and watch the world’s magnetism switch and watch the date on the calendar change 200 years or even more or watch mankind achieve a deeper understanding of themselves or the rest of the universe never thought possible.”
“So we gon yiff er wut” ster assed
“k”
“k gud cuz im finna git ma FUCK on nameen”
then star and the horses walked off into the sunset becuz that bitch spent a whole day crying lmao
just then, jermas mom returned from the kitchen
“whoooo wants CUCUMBER?”

posted about 4 years ago
#3 I wrote a litte tf2 short story :) in The Dumpster

INCOMING 3RD PART TO OUR EMMY-LOSING TRILOGY

posted about 4 years ago
#1 I wrote a litte tf2 short story :) in The Dumpster

jerma and star's misadventures in college 2

by rusemaster-pauladeen, Apr 16, 2014, 2:25:04 AM
Literature / Fan Fiction / Romance

Jerma and Star_ and Mal3a all have fuck
They all fuck each others assholes

The most anticipated sequel to any entertainment franchise literally fucking ever in any thing ever.

(a/n: This one is a little innapropriate for little FUCKERS like you, so you might wanna go WALTZ back to your fucking CHATEAU like a little BITCH and finger yourself in your GAY fucking MAN CLIT YOU LITTLE BITCH.
This one isn't for you
this one is gonna be BRUTAL)

SECTION 1

Three years after the events of their peenybutt adventure, Jerma and Star were busy enjoying some nice FUCK as they usually do.
"WHIP ME RIGHT IN THE FUKCING ASSHOLE YOU BRUTAL FUCKING WHORE" star screamed, actually literally like pinching one of his nipples right the fuck off.
"YOU WANNA FUCKING DIE HAVING FUCK RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW BITCH" jerma brutale'd.
"THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU FUCKING SHIT GUZZLING HORSE ASSHOLE RAPIST" star literally just even.
(a/n: star and jerma arent mlp ocs anymore like they were in my last fanfic but the ocs are their fursonas now and they sometimes bring them out when theyre having make)
Suddenly there was a knock on their front door that they didn't hear but jermas mom heard and she opened it.
The door.
She opened.
The door.
and ma3la was there
"HEY DICK MONGRELS THERES A DEGENERATE PIECE OF LIKE ACTUAL HUMAN GARBAGE HERE TO SEE YOU"
"ALRIGHT SEND HIM DOWN"
As soon as ma3la opened the door to the fuck dungeon, the putrid, delicious scent of unwashed gamer ass was wayyyy to brutal for his ass stench dm so he immediately donned a leather horse mask hanging on a nearby coat peg that was also used for ass fuck.
"hey ma3la hows it going" jerma said, coated head to toe in peanut oil and ass nectar.
"good, you."
"pretty good, just teaching star here how to FUCK INTO HIS ANUS"
"so thats why he's not in the mumble right now"
"yeah"
"aight. i kinda wanted to play csgo with him but ya no"
"he'll be done in a sec"
"k"
The mumble went quiet for a while, oh wait star and jerma would not SHUT THE FUCK UP.
"WILL YOU GUYS SHUT THE ACTUAL ASS FUCK UP IM MUTING YOU"
"dang i have never seen ma3la go BALLISTIC before holy shit" jerma paused, wiping off his hands, lower arms, and even ELBOWS.
All of which were fucking ripped to fucking fuck.
Like i said
brutal.

SECTION 2 OF FUCK HAPPEN

Jerma got pretty bored after a while, so he sent ma3la a message on steam asking him to come back into the mumble.
Like
a message on STEAM
like
THE STEAM
COMING OFF OF HIS CHEST CUZ HE WAS SO FUCKING BRUTAL
So ma3la did
do that.
"what do you want." ma3la said.
"i was wondering if could ring bottom bitch in about a half hour"
"idk i dont play much fuck dude man"
"cmon me and star are getting bored and we wanna have a peg"
"wait what? whats a peg"
"a "pick ep game". a "peg"
"oooooook."
"oh wait i was thinking of like videogame na man we just gonna have fuck int he asshole k"
"sounds pgud"
Pgud
isn't even a word its just like a fucking bastardous mistake of english developement
fucking shit

SECTION 3 IS THE ONE WHERE THEY FINALLY MAKE FUCK

Ma3la's whole body trembled with a bizarre mixture of nervousness and excitement. He had never before experienced relations with someone other than a women before, and had no idea what to expect. He was intriguied by the things he felt about star and jerma, and how he wanted to take part in their beautiful, perfectly normal, healthy relationship. He also was hesitant, the thought of taking another grown man sexually being entirely alien to him. He had no idea what to expect. Like zero. Like none.
Thats probably why he fucked it up.
(a/n: s=star, j=jerma, m=mailer kktybbs)
j:MALEA WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING
m: (removes dick frum mouth2talk)wat jeez what did i do
j: YOU ARENT SUPPOSED TO USE TEETH WHEN SUCKING PENUS THIS SHIT IS UNPLAYABLE
s: godamn faggot nice choke you LOST MID for us
j: HOLY FUCK
m: well alright what now
j: *sighs* well we cant really have buttsecks bcuz SOMEONE tore my dick up like the fuckin marked men from the lonesome road dlc
(a/n: if you dont know wtf that is the marked men are like srsly torn up like cheese pizza face lookin mothas now just imagine that on jermas dick also IMAGINE JERMAS DICK FUCKIN
༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ)
s: ooohhhhh but daddyyyy i need your big, meaty load sooo baaaad
m:WHAT THE FUCK
j:dude that is fucking gross dude like i didnt know STAR WORKED AT THE AIRPORT...
...
...
CUZ HES GOT HELLA BAGGAGE
m: meatshot godamn 8)
j: aright i GUESS we could try some fisting here if you boys feel up2it
s: sounds good to me
m: OOOOOO IDK SENPAI....BAKA
j:you are a FAGGOT GODAMN

So then they tried fisting.
Star went first, being undoubtedly the most experienced and stretchiest of the two.\
j: alright I HOPE YOURE READY FAGGOT
S: I AM READY FAGGER
Ma3la closed his eyes, because it was 2brutal for him to look directly at it.
Its like a friggin
ass eclipse
like the ass is completely covering the fist and you dont wanna look at it bcuz when a little bit of the fist comes from out behind the ass its gonna shine 50 times as bright as the whole fist being their and youre gonna go blind.

KER PLOP

the fist made an audible really gross sound as stars anus fully swallowed it up.
j: aight that was pretty good, now its your turn "male"a

m: ok....
Ma3la hesitantly took off his dainty underthings and positioned his anus below jermas oiled, ready fist.

j: Ok imma go slowly now. On three ok?
m: .................................................baka
j: three, TWO
Jerma fucking shoved it in there WHOLE fist first like a fucking brutal master and started diggin around like a fucking carnival claw toy.

m: FUCKING HOLYFUCK NIGERIA ECUADOR CHOCOLATE CHIP BATMAN
s: ;_; is so brutalful

It was NOT so brutalful, however, when jerma pulled out a good handful of distended rectum.

m: WHY WHY WHY WHYW HYW WHY WY WHWY HWY
s: IM NEVER EATING GROUND BEEF AGAIN
j: well I, FOR ONE THINK IT LOOKS LIKE A ROSE AND YOU GUYS HAFTA RESPECT MY SENSITIVE SIDE

Then jerma went on a big fucking monologue about being treated like a big angry bear and his feelings and shit.

Which is when you realized that jerma was the heavy AND THIS IS A TF2 FANFICTION NOW.

which is also when ma3la gave birth to jesus

posted about 4 years ago